Thursday, August 30, 2007

Bus-ology

So yesterday, I was riding on the Most Crowded Bus Ever.

I know that those of you who went to U of M are saying "listen buddy, you don't know nuthin' about crowded. Let ME tell you about crowded..." or something a little more grammatically correct. You are a university graduate after all.

Listen, I have been to U of M, I have taken the bus home from there at 3:30 in the afternoon, and that ride doesn't even come close to this experience.

Take the human sardine can that is the 60 Pembina coming out of the U of M at the end of the day. Add to that 2 baby strollers, 3 seniors with walkers, one man in a wheelchair and a partridge in a pear tree. That was my ride to school yesterday. When the guy in the wheelchair had to get off the bus, it took ten minutes to get everyone off to make room for him. One woman had to move her walker, but didn't want to. When the bus driver offered to move it for her and bring it back after the gentleman disembarked she replied, "well, ok. But I'm taking my money with me!" Like the bus driver is going to leave her $25.00 an hour job to steal your purse and abandon her bus full of passengers. I can just see her running down the street: "Woo hoo! I've got twenty bucks! Screw you Winnipeg Transit!"

But I digress...

I guess it's just a bit of a shock for me being so crowded. I haven't ridden the bus on a regular basis for over two years. I'm used to my quiet drive to work, in my car alone. With all the room in the world. I had this naive idea that I would be able to study and work on my laptop (this weekend, baby!) while I was riding the bus to school. Well, I don't have room to scratch my ass most days. Oh well. It's all worth it to save me money and to help the environment.

Remember those "Bus-ology" ads that used to be posted on the bus? You know, the ones that show all the annoying things that other passengers on the bus can do? Well they're back. It looks to me like they're just using the same ads that they used a few years ago. Way to save my tax dollar, city council! Anyway, I was thinking that they should come out with a series of these to show all the annoying things that the bus DRIVERS do on a regular basis. How about "Stoppus for Coffeeus too Oftenus." Or "Driveus Awayus when you're running after the Bussus and it's obvious to everyone around you that you really want to catch that bus but the effing driver won't stop! Er, -us."

Funny story related to that. One time I was running after the bus. I had had a REALLY bad day at work, I mean I was just in a pissy mood. I was running, and I thought the driver had seen me, but he started too pull away! I was so pissed off that I gave the driver the finger!

Then he stopped.

Sheepishly I approached the bus to get on. He wouldn't let me on at first. He mimicked me giving the finger and I mimed an apology. He opened the door and gave me a mini-lecture: "If I see you, I'll stop," he says. How am I supposed to know that when 99% of the Transit drivers out there won't (or so it seems to me.) I got on the bus and he drove on. The moral of the story: never give the bus driver the finger- When you depend on them to get home, they hold all the power.

3 comments:

Mike said...

And therein kay the problem, bud: People will generally be a dick to you in a level inversely proportionate to the amount of actual power they have. A store manager will be nice to an angry customer, if only to encourage them to go away. However, the clerk,(bearing in mind that I bore that title for many years, and thusly know of what I speak), who has been shat upon all day by passersby, will use every opportunity to screw you if he or she can. Bus drivers, who have to deal with the overcrowding and bitchy passengers you mention all day, will oft delight in driving off on a frantic passenger, out of a sense of sheer and utter schadenfreude.

Or so goes my theory.

Anyhoo, long story short, keep giving them the finger; the only way to get them to stop is to give them the opportunity to give a lecture. You may have to endure the lecture, but at least you got a ride.

Mike said...

And therein kay the problem, bud: People will generally be a dick to you in a level inversely proportionate to the amount of actual power they have. A store manager will be nice to an angry customer, if only to encourage them to go away. However, the clerk,(bearing in mind that I bore that title for many years, and thusly know of what I speak), who has been shat upon all day by passersby, will use every opportunity to screw you if he or she can. Bus drivers, who have to deal with the overcrowding and bitchy passengers you mention all day, will oft delight in driving off on a frantic passenger, out of a sense of sheer and utter schadenfreude.

Or so goes my theory.

Anyhoo, long story short, keep giving them the finger; the only way to get them to stop is to give them the opportunity to give a lecture. You may have to endure the lecture, but at least you got a ride.

Mike said...

Great blog, by the way. Keep it up!